One of the most wide spread myths that has been associated with God's religion over the centuries is the issue of "Polygyny". It is customary for people when they think of Islam, or even when they embrace Islam, that they automatically have a license to marry more than one wife (upto a maximum of 4).
Men tend to fantasize that this is due to the high sexual libido that God has given them and that it is part of their Homo-Sapien right of male domination.
Even women in the Islamic world have come to accept the idea of Polygyny as being ordained by God and therefore not open for debate or questioning. The woman in Islamic society may not like the idea of sharing her husband with other women, but it is a fact of life she has been taught to accept and respect.
Did the Lord of the Universe realize that Muslim men were hormone driven animals that needed the sexual satisfaction of more than one mate? Or is it us who as usual interpret God's revelations with our desires rather than our brains?.
Where in the Quran can we find this command that justifies Polygyny?
"You shall hand over to the ORPHANS* their rightful properties. Do not substitute the bad for the good, and do not consume their properties by combining them with yours. This would be a gross injustice. If you fear that you will not be equitable towards the ORPHANS*, then you may marry those who are agreeable to you of the women: two, and three, and four. If you fear lest you become unfair, then you shall be content with only one, or whom you are committed to by your oath. This is best that you do not face financial hardship." (4/2-3)
"They consult you concerning women: say, "GOD enlightens you regarding them, as recited for you in the scripture. The mothers of ORPHANS* that you wish to marry but do not give them their due dowries, you shall be just. The rights of young boys must also be protected. You shall treat the orphans equitably. Whatever good you do, GOD is fully aware thereof." (4/127)
* Orphans in Arabic (Yatama) is used for a child who has lost his father. A child who has lost his mother is not considered an Orphan in Arabic.
Any reader of the above verse does not have to be a genius to understand that Polygyny is CONDITIONAL that a person wants to be equitable towards the ORPHANS!
But WHO are these ORPHANS that we are responsible for yet it is likely that we will not treat them favorably?.
Again, we do not have to look beyond the tip of our noses for the answer:
"Do not give those who are immature the money which God has ENTRUSTED you with. You shall provide for them from it and cloth them, and say to them what is just. You shall test the orphans when they reach puberty. As soon as you find them mature enough, GIVE THEM THEIR PROPERTY..." (4/5-6)
You must be the GUARDIAN to these Orphans and caretaker to their inheritance BEFORE even considering Polygyny. It is not just for a man to just pick children off the street and claim that he will marry their mother. The man must be the Guardian to the children because they (the Orphans) are from his blood.
After laying out the rules in which Polygyny is allowed, we are also dealt with more restrictions in the Quran:
"You can never be equitable in dealing with more than one wife, no matter how hard you try. Therefore, do not be so biased as to leave one of them hanging. If you correct this situation and maintain righteousness, GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful." (4/129)
"Forbidden for you are your mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and the sisters of your father, and the sisters of your mother, and the daughters of your brother, and the daughters of your sister, and your foster mothers who suckled you, and your sisters from suckling, and the mothers of your women, and your step-daughters who are in your lodgings from your women with whom you have already consummated the marriage; if you have not consummated the marriage then there is no sin upon you; and those who were in wedlock with your sons who are from your seed, and that you join between two sisters except what has already been done. God is Forgiving, Merciful." (4:23)
So, as we have it DETAILED in God's Book:
- Orphans placed in our guardianship are to be treated fairly.
- If we fear biased-ness or unfairness in treatment, we may marry their mother.
- We must pay their mother her dowry as in the case of a normal marriage.
- We cannot be biased in our dealings with either wife.
- Polygyny cannot be made with two sisters.
Under these circumstances it becomes very clear how God's perfect system will be a shield for children who have lost their fathers and need protection in this world, rather than a license for sexual fantasies as most are led to believe.
May the Lord grant us His mercy for all the wrong we have done.
Written for www.free-minds.org