Friendships with non Muslims

[Alen]

AlhamdilAllah,
SubhanAllah.

[Shinobitora]

 Wow, can't be friend with non-Muslims ,eh? Well, I wouldn't have very many friends if that was the case.

Or take this for instance:
My husband was a good friend of mine before and after my conversion. After we got married he decided to convert. He was away at school and called me to tell me that he had thought about it alot and had been studying. And since the person he loved and respected the most was also the greatest Muslim he knew,  he had decided to tell me first that he had said his shahada. Which ofcourse made me cry and laugh at the same time. I had given up all hope b/c he had stopped talking to me about it. Turns out he had wanted time alone to sort it out for himself, without me influencing him.  
Alhamdulillah, I was already following the Quran alone at this time, so he started out right from the very beginning,mashallah.^_^
If I had not been friends with this non-Muslim man, not only would I have missed out on being with the most amazing husband Allah could have ever blessed me with but also, he probably would not have converted or even thought of it seriously to begin with.

And ofcourse the Sunnis doubly would consider me kafr for this: 1. For being friends with a non-Muslim, a man especially and 2. For marrying him, even though he was not yet Muslim.

[Alen]

Hi.

to the forum, sister
God Bless you.

[FAR]

From the verses below... I take it that, one cannot take non-muslims as friends, but one can be a wali to them.

The Noble Qur'an: Al-Ma'idah 5:51
O you who believe! Take not the Jews and the Christians as 'Auliya' (friends, protectors, helpers etc.), they are but 'Auliya' to one another.  And if any amongst you takes them as 'Auliya' then surely he is one of them.  Verily, Allah guides not those people who are the Zalimun (polytheists and wrong-doers and unjust)."


The Noble Qur'an: Al-Mumtahinah 60:1-9, 13
1. O you who believe! Take not My enemies and your enemies (i.e. disbelievers and polytheists, etc.) as friends, showing affection towards them, while they have disbelieved in what has come to you of the truth (i.e. Isl?mic Monotheism, this Qur'?n, and Muhammad ), and have driven out the Messenger (Muhammad ) and yourselves (from your homeland) because you believe in All?h your Lord! If you have come forth to strive in My Cause and to seek My Good Pleasure, (then take not these disbelievers and polytheists, etc., as your friends). You show friendship to them in secret, while I am All-Aware of what you conceal and what you reveal. And whosoever of you (Muslims) does that, then indeed he has gone (far) astray, (away) from the Straight Path.

2. Should they gain the upper hand over you, they would behave to you as enemies, and stretch forth their hands and their tongues against you with evil, and they desire that you should disbelieve.

3. Neither your relatives nor your children will benefit you on the Day of Resurrection (against All?h). He will judge between you. And All?h is the All-Seer of what you do.

4. Indeed there has been an excellent example for you in Ibr?him (Abraham) and those with him, when they said to their people: "Verily, we are free from you and whatever you worship besides All?h, we have rejected you, and there has started between us and you, hostility and hatred for ever, until you believe in All?h Alone," except the saying of Ibr?him (Abraham) to his father: "Verily, I will ask for forgiveness (from All?h) for you, but I have no power to do anything for you before All?h ." Our Lord! In You (Alone) we put our trust, and to You (Alone) we turn in repentance, and to You (Alone) is (our) final Return,

5. "Our Lord! Make us not a trial for the disbelievers, and forgive us, Our Lord! Verily, You, only You are the All-Mighty, the All-Wise."

6. Certainly, there has been in them an excellent example for you to follow, for those who look forward to (the Meeting with) All?h (for the reward from Him) and the Last Day. And whosoever turn away, then verily, All?h is Rich (Free of all wants), Worthy of all Praise.

7. Perhaps All?h will make friendship between you and those whom you hold as enemies. And All?h has power (over all things), and All?h is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

8. All?h does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion and did not drive you out of your homes. Verily, All?h loves those who deal with equity.

9. It is only as regards those who fought against you on account of religion, and have driven you out of your homes, and helped to drive you out, that All?h forbids you to befriend them. And whosoever will befriend them, then such are the Z?lim?n (wrong-doers those who disobey All?h).

13. O you who believe! Take not as friends the people who incurred the Wrath of All?h (i.e. the Jews). Surely, they have been in despair to receive any good in the Hereafter, just as the disbelievers have been in despair about those (buried) in graves (that they will not be resurrected on the Day of Resurrection).

Disbelieving Relatives


The Noble Qur'an: At-Tauba 9:23
O you who believe! Take not for 'Auliya' (supporters and helpers) your fathers and your brothers if they prefer disbelief to Belief. And whoever of you does so, then he is one of the Zalimun (wrong-doers, etc).

Hypocrites


The Noble Qur'an: An-Nisa 4:88-89
Then what is the matter with you that you are divided into two parties about the hypocrites? Allah has cast them back (to disbelief) because of what they have earned. Do you want to guide him whom Allah has made to go astray? And he whom Allah has made to go astray, you will never find for him any way (of guidance). They wish that you reject Faith, as they have rejected (Faith), and thus that you all become equal (like one another). So take not 'Auliya' (protectors or friends) from them, till they emigrate in the Way of Allah (to Muhammad ). But if they turn back (from Islam), take (hold) of them and kill them wherever you find them, and take neither 'Auliya' (protectors or friends) nor helpers from them.


The Noble Qur'an: An-Nisa 4:139
Those who take disbelievers for 'Auliya' (protectors or helpers or friends) instead of believers, do they seek honour, power and glory with them? Verily, then to Allah belongs all honour, power and glory.

The Noble Qur'an: An-Nisa 4:144
O you who believe! Take not for 'Auliya' (protectors or helpers or friends) disbelievers instead of believers. Do you wish to offer Allah a manifest proof against yourselves?

Muslims


The Noble Qur'an: Al-Ma'idah 5:55
Verily, your Wal? (Protector or Helper) is All?h, His Messenger, and the believers, - those who perform As-Sal?t (Iq?mat-as-Sal?t), and give Zak?t, and they bow down (submit themselves with obedience to All?h in prayer).


The Noble Qur'an: At-Taubah 9:71
The believers, men and women, are Auliy?' (helpers, supporters, friends, protectors) of one another, they enjoin (on the people) Al-Ma'r?f (i.e. Isl?mic Monotheism and all that Isl?m orders one to do), and forbid (people) from Al-Munkar (i.e. polytheism and disbelief of all kinds, and all that Isl?m has forbidden); they perform As-Sal?t (Iq?mat-as-Sal?t) and give the Zak?t, and obey All?h and His Messenger. All?h will have His Mercy on them. Surely All?h is All-Mighty, All-Wise.


The Noble Qur'an: Al-Anfal 8:73
And those who disbelieve are allies to one another, (and) if you (Muslims of the whole world collectively) do not do so (i.e. become allies, as one united block with one Khalifah - chief Muslim ruler for the whole Muslim world to make victorious All?h's Religion of Isl?mic Monotheism), there will be Fitnah (wars, battles, polytheism, etc.) and oppression on earth, and a great mischief and corruption (appearance of polytheism).

No Muslims in Town to be Friends With?


The Noble Qur'an: Ash-Shura 42:9
Or have they taken (for worship) Auliy?' (guardians, supporters, helpers, protectors, etc.) besides Him? But All?h, He Alone is the Wal? (Protector, etc.). And it is He Who gives life to the dead, and He is Able to do all things.


The Noble Qur'an: An-Nisa 4:119
...And whoever takes Shait?n (Satan) as a Wal? (protector or helper) instead of All?h, has surely suffered a manifest loss.

http://muttaqun.com/auliya.html

[Faithful-Jinn]

From the verses below... I take it that, one cannot take non-muslims as friends, but one can be a wali to them.

http://muttaqun.com/auliya.html

Please don't just throw a bunch of verses out but put them in proper context. At that point in history befriending Jews and Christians could mean death and treason it is not the same today we are not at war to allow the free practice of Islam at this point in time, alhamdullilah the Prophet (pbuh) and his Companions have established that right for us already.

[FAR]

Please don't just throw a bunch of verses out but put them in proper context. At that point in history befriending Jews and Christians could mean death and treason it is not the same today we are not at war to allow the free practice of Islam at this point in time, alhamdullilah the Prophet (pbuh) and his Companions have established that right for us already.

What context?? They're plain and simple to read understand, no?

http://www.quran4u.com/Tafsir%20Ibn%20Kathir/005%20Ma%27idah.htm#%D9%85%D9%8E%D9%86%D9%8F

No where in the verse does it speak about befriending jews and christians could be mean death for anyone, it states that one will become like them. And many a time, people's beliefs become like the people they spend time with and come close to.

[Faithful-Jinn]

What context?? They're plain and simple to read understand, no?

http://www.quran4u.com/Tafsir%20Ibn%20Kathir/005%20Ma%27idah.htm#%D9%85%D9%8E%D9%86%D9%8F

No where in the verse does it speak about befriending jews and christians could be mean death for anyone, it states that one will become like them. And many a time, people's beliefs become like the people they spend time with and come close to.

I believe you're taking these verses too literally. In Muhammad's (pbuh) time taking a non-Muslim as a friend meant something ENTIRELY different than it does in this day and age. The tribes of the Arabian peninsula wanted our Prophet and his followers dead at that time they did not want another group to challenge their wealth, power, or right to authority. At that time when the religion of Islam was still being established in the land and people were leaving their families and their homes to follow the Prophet the atmosphere was much much different than we can even imagine. Taking a non-Muslim as a friend during that time could very well mean treason with the Jewish tribes and the other Arabian tribes working together to exterminate the Prophet and his Companions (pbut).

Why would God allow us Muslim men to take Jewish and Christian wives if we aren't even allowed to FRATERNIZE with people of other faiths my friend?

Or do you put the People of the Book in a different category as other 'disbelievers'?

[harris]

Wow, can't be friend with non-Muslims ,eh? Well, I wouldn't have very many friends if that was the case.

Or take this for instance:
My husband was a good friend of mine before and after my conversion. After we got married he decided to convert. He was away at school and called me to tell me that he had thought about it alot and had been studying. And since the person he loved and respected the most was also the greatest Muslim he knew,  he had decided to tell me first that he had said his shahada. Which ofcourse made me cry and laugh at the same time. I had given up all hope b/c he had stopped talking to me about it. Turns out he had wanted time alone to sort it out for himself, without me influencing him.  
Alhamdulillah, I was already following the Quran alone at this time, so he started out right from the very beginning,mashallah.^_^
If I had not been friends with this non-Muslim man, not only would I have missed out on being with the most amazing husband Allah could have ever blessed me with but also, he probably would not have converted or even thought of it seriously to begin with.

And ofcourse the Sunnis doubly would consider me kafr for this: 1. For being friends with a non-Muslim, a man especially and 2. For marrying him, even though he was not yet Muslim.

Salaam sista,
tats a beautiful love-story. Wishing you both a long, prosperous happy married life.

As u pointed out, avoiding frendship with non-muslims makes sense only for the haters. How can one choose frends based on religion? And anyways, as the Holy Quraan clearly points out in sura 2:62 and 5:69, there is no difference between a muslim and non-muslim in the eyes of Allah as long as we are righteous and worship Him. On the other hand, it might seem advisable to stay away from those who have totally lost their path. Like for example, a drug addict, womanizer, pedophile etc. who are a bad influence on everybody around them and have surely gone astray.



Surely, those who believe, those who are Jewish, the Christians, and the converts; anyone who
(1) believes in GOD, and
(2) believes in the Last Day, and
(3) leads a righteous life,
will receive their recompense from their Lord;  they have nothing to fear, nor will they grieve.
~ [Quran 2:62, 5:69]


Peace.

[Raaajah]

Salaam,

There is nothing wrong with developing a personal friendship with a non-Muslim to help him/her understand and appreciate Islam and to ultimately embrace it if they chose to.  

5:5
This day are good things made lawful for you. The food of those who have received the Scripture is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for them. And so are the virtuous women of the believers and the virtuous women of those who received the Scripture before you when ye give them their marriage portions and live with them in honour, not in fornication, nor taking them as secret concubines. Whoso denieth the faith, his work is vain and he will be among the losers in the Hereafter.

from Haqeeqat.org
Today for you all people the nutrient, nourishing things "tayyi'baate" have been made permissible/lawful;

and the [tayyub] prandial of those whom Book was given earlier also are permissible for you people, the believers, and your prandial is permissible for them;

and are permissible for you [for Nikah] the women enjoying protection of their families from amongst the believing ones;

and the women enjoying protection of their families from amongst the people whom Book was given in times before it was given to you.

And whoever refuses to accept [these restraints/injunction]/apostatizes then indeed his act has gone fruitless/wasted/weightless,

[Same information in same words in 3:85]

and that person shall be amongst the losers in the Hereafter. [5:05]

[Raaajah]

Therefore it is very clear that at personal level there is no harm in having friendship with any. But there are some ayats
such as from the surah above

O ye who believe! Take not the Jews and the Christians for friends. They are friends one to another. He among you who taketh them for friends is of them. Lo! Allah guideth not wrongdoing folk.

O Ye who believe! Choose not for guardians such of those who received the Scripture before you, and of the disbelievers, as make a jest and sport of your religion. But keep your duty to Allah if ye are true believers.

If you take these in today's context the Arab kings, Pakistan and other Muslim countries with exception of few have taken non believers as their Guardians and Allies, the result is obvious by not following Allah's commands.