about polygamy

[mr. humble]

as-salamualaikum(may peace be on you) readers,

i got this info from www.irf.net... hope it helps...


Question 1:

Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

Answer:

Definition of Polygamy

1.  Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?


2.  The Qur?an is the only religious scripture in the world that says,"marry only one".


The Qur?an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ?marry only one?. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.


3.  Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims


The report of the ?Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam?, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.


4.   Qur?an permits limited polygyny


As I mentioned earlier, Qur?an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ?marry only one?. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur?an:

"Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one."

                                  [Al-Qur?an 4:3]

Before the Qur?an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

"Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women...."

                                 [Al-Qur?an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do?s and Don?ts:

?Fard? i.e. compulsory or obligatory

?Mustahab? i.e. recommended or encouraged

?Mubah? i.e. permissible or allowed

?Makruh? i.e. not recommended or discouraged

?Haraam? i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.


5.  Average life span of females is more than that of males


By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.


6.   India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide


India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.

7.   World female population is more than male population


In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.

8.   Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical


Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

***************************************************************************************


Question 2:

If a man is allowed to have more than one wife, then why does Islam prohibit a woman from having more than one husband?

Answer:

A lot of people, including some Muslims, question the logic of allowing Muslim men to have more than one spouse while denying the same ?right? to women.

Let me first state emphatically, that the foundation of an Islamic society is justice and equity. Allah has created men and women as equal, but with different capabilities and different responsibilities. Men and women are different, physiologically and psychologically. Their roles and responsibilities are different. Men and women are equal in Islam, but not identical.

Surah Nisa? Chapter 4 verses 22 to 24 gives the list of women with who you can not marry and it is further mentions in Surah Nisa? Chapter 4 verse 24 "Also (prohibited are) women already married"

The following points enumerate the reasons why polyandry is prohibited in Islam:


1.   If a man has more than one wife, the parents of the children born of such marriages can easily be identified. The father as well as the mother can easily be identified. In case of a woman marrying more than one husband, only the mother of the children born of such marriages will be identified and not the father. Islam gives tremendous importance to the identification of both parents, mother and father. Psychologists tell us that children who do not know their parents, especially their father undergo severe mental trauma and disturbances. Often they have an unhappy childhood. It is for this reason that the children of prostitutes do not have a healthy childhood. If a child born of such wedlock is admitted in school, and when the mother is asked the name of the father, she would have to give two or more names! I am aware that recent advances in science have made it possible for both the mother and father to be identified with the help of genetic testing. Thus this point which was applicable for the past may not be applicable for the present.


2.   Man is more polygamous by nature as compared to a woman.


3.   Biologically, it is easier for a man to perform his duties as a husband despite having several wives. A woman, in a similar position, having several husbands, will not find it possible to perform her duties as a wife. A woman undergoes several psychological and behavioral changes due to different phases of the menstrual cycle.


4.   A woman who has more than one husband will have several sexual partners at the same time and has a high chance of acquiring venereal or sexually transmitted diseases which can also be transmitted back to her husband even if all of them have no extra-marital sex. This is not the case in a man having more than one wife, and none of them having extra-marital sex.


The above reasons are those that one can easily identify. There are probably many more reasons why Allah, in His Infinite Wisdom, has prohibited polyandry.


as-salamualaikum, Rifat

[Ahmad Bilal]

Peace, Mr. Humble.

Many Sunnis and Shi'as adapted the Scripture to allow them to have more than one wife. If you read the entire section where this "polygamy" is mentioned, you'll notice that the Scripture is speaking of taking care of orphans. That is the only stipulation, according to Al-Qur'aan, where a Muslim man is permitted to have more than one wife. Other than that, he should only have one. You have to examine the whole concept and Scripture, not just a portion of it - that's the only way to get the full meaning of the verse...

Peace.

[mr. humble]

Peace, Mr. Humble.

Many Sunnis and Shi'as adapted the Scripture to allow them to have more than one wife. If you read the entire section where this "polygamy" is mentioned, you'll notice that the Scripture is speaking of taking care of orphans. That is the only stipulation, according to Al-Qur'aan, where a Muslim man is permitted to have more than one wife. Other than that, he should only have one. You have to examine the whole concept and Scripture, not just a portion of it - that's the only way to get the full meaning of the verse...

Peace.

assalamualaikum, i agree with you, however, does the quran Prohibit polygany(men having more than one wife)?? i know it prohibits polyandry..too lazy to quote verse. sorry...

[TheBookAlone]

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do?s and Don?ts:

?Mustahab? i.e. recommended or encouraged

?Mubah? i.e. permissible or allowed

?Makruh? i.e. not recommended or discouraged

?Haraam? i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Mr. Humble, of the four that I listed, could you please tell me one ayat for each word where one can find these words, or are the definitions gotten from some outside source other than the Quran?

[Leyna]

Peace, mr. humble 

I am familiar with this text, and, I am sorry to say, Zakir Naik is an idiot in my opinion. His theories and opinions often contradict scientific facts, and some are downright silly.

Some of the things he claims in this text don't make sense, some are offensive, some are un-Qur'anic.

First of all, polygamy is about orphans, not about men's supposed sexual appetites, "modesty of women", or some of the other things he lists.

I suggest you check out this thread, you might find some of it interesting:

http://free-minds.org/forum/index.php?topic=16221.30

World female population is more than male population

Wrong. In some countries, men outnumber women. I suggest checking out statistics on the issue.

Secondly, such games with numbers don't really make sense. Not every person who is not married wants to be married. Many women who don't have a husband are actually older women or widows, yet we rarely hear of men marrying an older or widowed woman as a second wife.

The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women.

Why doesn't he take Lesbians into the equation? Because they don't exist in his universe? Or because it would reduce the number of unmarried women in dire need of a husband, which he claims is a reason for polygamy?

Germany has five million more females as compared to males.

Not true. In 2007, the population of Germany was 82,5 millions, 42,2 millions of which were women. Too lazy to check the statistics for other countries right now.

Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

As I said, such games with numbers don't make any sense. They don't take into account the age structure of those who are single, whether they actually want to marry / re-marry and other facts that play a role.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

As a woman, and a single woman at that, I find this highly offensive, and idiotic as well. So the only option for a single woman is to become "public property" or a second wife ... wtf?!? This guy needs his brain checked.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Despite the fact that this is a favourite argument of people who promote polygamy, it is not true. It is not "common" for men to have mistresses and multiple affairs, neither is it accepted by society. Also, it's completely beside the point, because polygamy is not about men's desire for sexual variety.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

Well, I do not consider being a second wife to be an "honourable position". If I can't find a man whom I'd wish to marry, I would rather stay single for the rest of my life than being someone's second wife. The "public property" argument, as I said above, is silly, insulting and has no Qur'anic basis at all.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

Wrong. Mr. Naik should open the Qur'an and check what it actually says about polygamy. The Qur'an gives a very clear reason: If you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphans. (4:3)

If a child born of such wedlock is admitted in school, and when the mother is asked the name of the father, she would have to give two or more names!

If a child born into a polygamous marriage is admitted in school and is asked the name of the mother, it would have to give two or more names. Is that any better?

Man is more polygamous by nature as compared to a woman.

Same old, same old ... men are always willing and able to have sex, women are created with less libido. That is nonsense; there are men AND women who have a high libido and enjoy having multiple partners.

Biologically, it is easier for a man to perform his duties as a husband despite having several wives. A woman, in a similar position, having several husbands, will not find it possible to perform her duties as a wife.

That is pure speculation. Besides, there are some societies that practice polyandry (a wife having numerous husbands).

A woman undergoes several psychological and behavioral changes due to different phases of the menstrual cycle.

Aha. And from that we conclude that a man can have multiple wifes, but a woman can not have several husbands?

A woman who has more than one husband will have several sexual partners at the same time and has a high chance of acquiring venereal or sexually transmitted diseases which can also be transmitted back to her husband even if all of them have no extra-marital sex. This is not the case in a man having more than one wife, and none of them having extra-marital sex.

This does not make any sense at all, it's utter nonsense.

[liquiddharma]

Polygamy was invented by men who cannot control their penis. And actually, the New Testament does rule out polygamy in the same way as it rules out divorce:

Matthew 19v8-9

Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."

[jaythikay99]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQaPBU5ppsk

[Leyna]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQaPBU5ppsk

He is such a clown.

[jaythikay99]

He is such a clown.

precisely!

another example:

Marriage of Ayesha (ra) with Muhammad (peace be upon him) : Dr Zakir Naik

[Leyna]

I don't understand why so many people flock to hear him. Not only does he talk mostly crap, it is very hard to understand him due to his strong accent, lisp etc. He is a really bad speaker. I can hardly bear listening to him for more than a couple of minutes.