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QURANIC VERSUS ON CHILD ABUSE!

Started by Ming-Lo, February 04, 2006, 05:56:32 PM

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Ming-Lo

February 04, 2006, 05:56:32 PM
Salams (Peace),

Okay, here is the story. my brother married a girl from Morocco, he had the stereotypical mindset of women coming from "muslim" countries are all great wives and mothers. Well, now they have 2 wonderful girls who are everything any parent can ask for in a child. You'd think with children like them the only problem would be over spoiling, however this is far from the case. Eversince they were born (they are 2 and 3 now) she's been overly abusive to them. She has been beeting them and calling them the most awful names you can think of before they even reached a year (I've witnessed this for myself). She drags them on the floor and tosses them all over the room for simple things as spilling juice on their clothes. My brother has talked to her about this, but no further action has been taken on this matter, so since all she knows my brother will do is talk to her she pays it no mind and continues.

Recently, I have just found out that she has been beating them with shoes and belts and other object (keep in mind they are 2 and 3 yrs old toddlers). And I will NOT let this slide! Me and my mother have decided to have a meeting with my brother, and we want it to be effective, and one thing my brother always prides himself on is how much he wants to devote himslef to God and how much he is trying to stay on the "haqq" (sp). So we want to open the meeting with a Quranic verse on Child abuse so he can't dismiss it and he'll have to listen and take action. i pray to God that this will be effective. My nieces, especially the oldest one who is 3 is incredibly emotionally disturbed, and I want to do everything in my power to ensure a happy future for them. And if this doesn't work then I'll have to take it to extreme measures (which we have been trying to avoid), even if they mess up the relationship between my brother and I.

thank you and I pray that God blesses you all!
has anybody ever wondered if people like Buddha (or someone else), were actually like messengers of there time, but later on throught misunderstanding was turned into a thing of worship like how Jesus was?

TheNabi

#1
February 04, 2006, 06:13:54 PM
Peace

Some good parental examples can be found in the reading [31/13-19].

Be good to the parents and the near of kin [2/83; 4/36].

Joe
All information in my posts is correct to the best of my knowledge only and thus should not be taken as a fact. One should seek for verification & knowledge. ~> [3/190-191; 17/

enquirer

#2
February 04, 2006, 06:18:10 PM
Peace ming-lo and all. I am very sorry to hear of this situation. It is obviously wrong to harm children. The quran says the believers are a brotherhood. Now children are part of this brotherhood,and this means to treat them well. children need more patience and care because they are more vulnerable. Try to find out why the wife is doing these things,she might need help and/or education. I ask other members of the forum to help with suggestions and/or any quotes from the quran etc.
Peace all.

sawtooth

#3
February 04, 2006, 07:03:32 PM
It certainly should not take a text from any book for someone to see that is just wrong. There are no excuses or justification for doing that OR for not taking a child OUT of that enviornment. I would just take the child and tell that woman that either she get couseling and straighten up, or you will contact the authorities and have her put in jail and her children permanantly removed. If SHE threatens to call authorities when you take the kids, tell her to go ahead, you will inform them as to exactly WHY you are taking them.

If you do NOT remove them imediately, you are as bad as the mother, if not worse.

Ming-Lo

#4
February 05, 2006, 01:00:52 AM
Quote from: "sawtooth"It certainly should not take a text from any book for someone to see that is just wrong. There are no excuses or justification for doing that OR for not taking a child OUT of that enviornment. I would just take the child and tell that woman that either she get couseling and straighten up, or you will contact the authorities and have her put in jail and her children permanantly removed. If SHE threatens to call authorities when you take the kids, tell her to go ahead, you will inform them as to exactly WHY you are taking them.

If you do NOT remove them imediately, you are as bad as the mother, if not worse.

I agree with you 100%!!!
has anybody ever wondered if people like Buddha (or someone else), were actually like messengers of there time, but later on throught misunderstanding was turned into a thing of worship like how Jesus was?

Latifah

#5
February 05, 2006, 06:02:06 AM
Quote from: "sawtooth"It certainly should not take a text from any book for someone to see that is just wrong. There are no excuses or justification for doing that OR for not taking a child OUT of that enviornment. I would just take the child and tell that woman that either she get couseling and straighten up, or you will contact the authorities and have her put in jail and her children permanantly removed. If SHE threatens to call authorities when you take the kids, tell her to go ahead, you will inform them as to exactly WHY you are taking them.

If you do NOT remove them imediately, you are as bad as the mother, if not worse.

Salam,

Taking away the children would indeed be good for her. That would definitly give her time to think about her actions and hopefully realize that physical abuse is not a healthy way of raising children.
As a Moroccan myself I must say that child abuse often occures in Morrocan homes, especially Moroccans of the older generation. It's a way of forcing the children to show the parents respect.

So, Ming-Lo, I think your sister-in-law might also be raised up with physical abuse and that's why she's using it on her children. Maybe you should talk to her about it and tell her that it's not normal. Tell her that God says so, maybe that would wake her up.

I'm very against physical and verbal abuse and don't think it's healthy at all for the mind of a child. A child is innocent and doesn't know right from wrong, it's the parents job to show them that in a loving way.
GOD wishes to lighten your burden, for the human being is created weak. [4:028 Quran/Final Testament]

peacefulmuslim

#6
February 05, 2006, 07:22:32 AM
Hi Ming Lo,

I dunno if there is Quranic verse on child abuse.
But if u want to approach the subject through Quran, There is something called ''Righteousness'' which is mentioned umpteen number of times in Quran as a believer's responsibility/duty. How about pointing that?
I dunno why believers miss that bit. ''righteousness'' pretty much answers it all.

Quote from: "sawtooth"It certainly should not take a text from any book for someone to see that is just wrong. There are no excuses or justification for doing that OR for not taking a child OUT of that enviornment. I would just take the child and tell that woman that either she get couseling and straighten up, or you will contact the authorities and have her put in jail and her children permanantly removed. If SHE threatens to call authorities when you take the kids, tell her to go ahead, you will inform them as to exactly WHY you are taking them.
If you do NOT remove them imediately, you are as bad as the mother, if not worse.
I completely agree with Sawtooth on this. And I think u need to do something about the situation and immediately.

Peace!

Ming-Lo

#7
February 05, 2006, 10:56:39 AM
Salams!

Ok, so we had the meeting last night, and it was agreed that they move in with us so we can monitor her behaviour towards the children, while she goes to this parenting course. She's not allowed alone with the children at anytime, and if she doesn't seem to get any better then the children will be taken away from her completely. Well, I feel like things will work out pretty good either way so, thanks everyone for your inputs. God bless!
has anybody ever wondered if people like Buddha (or someone else), were actually like messengers of there time, but later on throught misunderstanding was turned into a thing of worship like how Jesus was?

Ming-Lo

#8
February 05, 2006, 11:07:51 AM
QuoteSo, Ming-Lo, I think your sister-in-law might also be raised up with physical abuse and that's why she's using it on her children. Maybe you should talk to her about it and tell her that it's not normal. Tell her that God says so, maybe that would wake her up.

Salams! We've tried this, and even went to a parenting convention, and just so she wouldn't think "oh, well this is how they do it in the west, not my country.", we went to one where the speakers were also Arab, and ones raised right in the country too (I believe Egypt). And for awhile we had thought it stopped, that's why they've been with them this long, because she'll make sure to be sweet as pie to them around us, but when she was around other Moroccans (or children that she thought wouldn't say anything) she would continue, and out of concern they let us know. I doubt if this other class will actually work, but it's a requirement, She's very stubborn or maybe I should say very ignorant.
has anybody ever wondered if people like Buddha (or someone else), were actually like messengers of there time, but later on throught misunderstanding was turned into a thing of worship like how Jesus was?

enquirer

#9
February 05, 2006, 11:10:08 AM
Peace ming-lo. I am really happy to hear this. I hope that the children will now be safe and happy. I also hope the mother will gain benefit from this situation.(and realise her error) My best wishes also to you,your brother and family. I like a happy ending :D .
Well done ming-lo  :D .(much Respect for doing the right thing and being brave.)
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