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Partner spends too much time on comp

Started by Nonya7, February 16, 2022, 05:00:02 PM

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Nonya7

My partner spends most of his day working on his religion website and doesn't have any other interests. He says he's always changing things on the website to make it more clear and admits he's a perfectionist. I can't tell him he's spending too much time on it without him assuming I'm against everything he's preaching even though I'm always agreeing with him and support his work. He's also constantly replying to people who leave messages even if the person is clearly only looking to argue so it's a waste of time. He doesn't have any other social media so all of his time is spend on his website. So I guess the question is how do you deal with a partner who's addicted to something online?

SarahY

So maybe ask yourself why is his addiction/passion a problem?

Open communication is important but def difficult when one wants to criticise someone's actions. So consider how is his time impacting you and what do you need from him to acheive a healthy, happy relationship. Communicating your needs, your expectations and feelings are important.

So maybe approach things differently.. e.g. I wish you had more time to do xyz it would make me feel so much better if xyz was done because it would make me feel.... (less pressure, supported, loved, appreciated, whatever).

Good luck
We all have blind spots.
Follow your heart but take your brain with you.
ambiguity is there for a reason, why do you think?
We're all different, so how can we all be equal?

good logic

A good religion should make a better person. Any addiction that creates strife and issues does not sound good.

Does your partner neglect his duties and responsibilities with this addiction? Then your partner also needs help and support.

Sister SarahY s advice is sound. Talk to your partner with a calm and honest dialogue . Begin the conversation with a smile and a hug.

Hope you sort it out .
GOD bless you.
Peace.
TOTAL LOYALTY TO GOD ALONE.   IN GOD I TRUST
38:65″ Say:? I warn you; There is no other god beside GOD, the One, the Supreme.?
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jkhan

Quote from: Nonya7 on February 16, 2022, 05:00:02 PM
My partner spends most of his day working on his religion website and doesn't have any other interests. He says he's always changing things on the website to make it more clear and admits he's a perfectionist. I can't tell him he's spending too much time on it without him assuming I'm against everything he's preaching even though I'm always agreeing with him and support his work. He's also constantly replying to people who leave messages even if the person is clearly only looking to argue so it's a waste of time. He doesn't have any other social media so all of his time is spend on his website. So I guess the question is how do you deal with a partner who's addicted to something online?

This is a very common thing nowadays... Everyone is using smartlhone and hanging on it.. At least I guess your partner is in good course...
Well what is his religious website anyway...  Let us know and hope we get better picture..
My concern is why you are in this forum as your first post and hardly blaming your partner and asking suggestions?
Why instead not go to the very website of your partner and raise your concerns as an anonymous person and ask your partner himself all your questions.. Coz he is answering to all questions..  At least then you spend time with him in any way... 
I feel it is not your partner spending lot of time in website is the issue.. Perhaps you don't know how to spend time fruitfully in case you are a believer...
Hypothetical question....  In case you are not working and partner is working in an office.. What would one do until he return back home...  You got to do something to beat the time.. Can one one complain he is using  ost of the time in office..
Anyway.. Be free and let others also be free...  Be responsible when it is required.. Enjoy life.. Be thankful to God.. God is available 24/7 for you to spend time with.. If you know..
Let us die with guidance

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Nonya7

I do communicate nicely and lately he's been spending less time on comp more time constantly thinking about topics he's working on and comments he gets. When we're relaxing he has his thinking face and doesn't really engage 100%. He is not as affectionate either cuz too busy in his head. I already told him all this he only changes for a day.

Nonya7

Found solution, limit time spent on comp and hide his phone to help with his ocd. He doesn't mind :)