An ardent cry of help! Someone, please?

[imrankhawaja]

@Imran

Indeed. Having no answer leads to a depressive state ... and I am right there. I am truly blessed in all other ways: finances, family, support, anything you name I am more or less blessed. However, what I don't have is what people call belief/faith. And it has taken away peace in all aspects of life. I have barely any will to move forward in life. I really don't know what I should be doing to regain faith. God knows I am hanging on to a straw now.

RED you are very lucky person i hope you stay blessed because in 95% cases depression related with these factors.

BLUE i will try sharing with you how to understand the current situation.

believe/faith vs truth/proven fact are really difficult to grasp.
we believe in something when we dnt want to discover something. its also distraction as we are blocking our reason of critical thinking..

when we admit we dnt know about something what we inherited in our faith then we are going on a track of discovering something.

when we reached at reality it become a belief for us by our own struggle in seeking something.. thats how we understand belief vs truth

when it comes to God (belief/faith) things get tricky.
because  (A) one person faith is different then (B) another person faith.

and both of them (A&B) have information from sources what observed by human them-selves.
( both dnt know but they have faith)

but we know the reality, (belief/faith) never worked same for everyone.

GREEN my ADVISE for you if you already blessed with everything around you just take this thing lightly, you should not thinking negative of not moving forward in your life based on the facts what we observed regarding faith.

live your life full.
attitude of admitting "we know nothing" is better than blind faith. be at peace. there is not any harm to go with side of your conscience.

[SarahY]

Salam,

I hope you're in a better state.

Something I wanted to add is we have the capacity to improve our minds and grow... For example, your mind as a teenager isn't the same as your adult mind. Through different experiences and knowledge our mind grows. Besides, if you don't trust your mind, who's mind will you be willing to give that authority to?

Not everyone's faith is secure, rational or authentic.

What causes certainty? Before, you didn't question and ponder but now that you have, that certainty has changed. Would you have believed your knowledge today if you told your previous sunni believing self?

I can relate to the discomfort of uncertainty but it's all part of personal growth. One answer can lead to more questions and sometimes answers will forever be unknown. I've accepted that sometimes I will not know but I've always had faith/belief in God.

Peace, blessings and happiness upon you too

[Rahma]

Salam,

I hope you're in a better state.

Something I wanted to add is we have the capacity to improve our minds and grow... For example, your mind as a teenager isn't the same as your adult mind. Through different experiences and knowledge our mind grows. Besides, if you don't trust your mind, who's mind will you be willing to give that authority to?

Not everyone's faith is secure, rational or authentic.

What causes certainty? Before, you didn't question and ponder but now that you have, that certainty has changed. Would you have believed your knowledge today if you told your previous sunni believing self?

I can relate to the discomfort of uncertainty but it's all part of personal growth. One answer can lead to more questions and sometimes answers will forever be unknown. I've accepted that sometimes I will not know but I've always had faith/belief in God.

Peace, blessings and happiness upon you too

Thank you, Sarah, for responding. I am a tad better than before. What a coincidence that you used the word "uncertainty" --- I have learned that I am going through OCD; but this OCD is religious and mental in nature. It latches onto doubt and you crave certainty for all answers. In my case it is about gaining certainty in faith, God, the world he has created, the way he would judge, the pain he has created, why he has created, etc. And, tbh, there are no answers for any of this. Even the Quran is not this detailed to have comprehensive answers. In fact, my obsessions reach out to Quran, its historicity, its authenticity, etc etc. It's a loop.

At this point, I have withdrawn myself from Quran and answering such questions. The only "cure" of OCD is accepting the uncertainty. I am working towards it. Once I do come back to faith, I know it will be about accepting the uncertainty. There is no absolute proof and reason for God, heaven, hell, his judgement, his plan for the world, the pain that exists. And there never will be. You can choose the best answers and keep on living. And perhaps risk your soul alongside ... everyone risks it eventually, muslim or not. And if God is just He would just have to accept people in good faith for their hard work, muslim or not.

[Asifzaheer]

I wish peace, blessings, and happiness upon you all.

Before I begin, I'd like to point out that I am not a shitty troll. My post is in earnest and I'd like to hear soothing, supporting words, anecdotes ... just about anything comforting ... from any and every one. Thanks.

Here it goes:

I am in a mess. I have been in a mess for almost a decade now. And by this mess I imply spiritual mess. Idk where I stand with God. As much as I want to believe in a benevolent creator, I get pushed away. And idk why this keeps happening to me. My story goes something like this:


I was born into a Muslim, Sunni family. My faith was strong and my belief in Quran, God, Muhammad was all great ... why wouldn't it be? I believed everything that my family portrayed as true ... I honestly didn't have the time or knowledge to question anything. However, by whatever stroke of luck, at age 19, I became genuinely interested in seeking and nourishing my relationship with Allah. I was sincere at that, but like all stories go, I was horrified by hadith literature and hadith influenced Quran. This was the first time I was carefully reading the scripture, and I was shaken to the core. I had issues with everything. My faith was so much more tested with the stuff I was studying in my undergrad. I was more or less agnostic because of this ... not because I was wanted to be, but because I couldn't fathom God, evil, and muslim scriptures with their odd stories. My existential anxiety turned into major depression ... I could not see the world without God, and yet the world more or less believed in no god at all.

By another stroke of luck I happened upon a Quran Alone group on facebook - I was relieved. Phew. I had been saved. Perhaps there was a way out. My anxiety subsided. And yet my faith was not "full" as it was when I was 18 all those years ago. I still had some issues with some verses --- I did not understand the Quran fully, nor did I fake to be a scholar --- but I always gave it my best. I read and re-read. I spent time on Arabic. I did what I could. And I stayed away from all "sins".

Push couple of more years and my anxiety peaked again, as I thought more and more about the world and its people. I just couldn't understand how each one of us could reach the idea of one god when most of us are never exposed to it. Progress of science and its commitment to erasing God has been no help. It just pushes people further off when they're already on thin ice. And yet I hung on to my faith. A faith that was in my heart but not in my questioning mind. I hoped that there was a God who witnessed my struggle and would eventually answer me. I remained committed to good and reading Quran.

But now it's been a year of so much pain and anxiety I have had to see a therapist to be re-assured that everything will be alright. I am on such thin ice that I can barely stand - I am afraid my faith will shatter and so will I. I don't know how to find God ... and which God do I find?

Everyone claims to have found God. You ask muslims, christians, jewish folks, hindus, sikhs, animists, gnostics, whichever denomination you pick claims to have found God and to have guidance. This only goes on to confirm the evolutionary theory of religion - we all have a spot(s) in our brain that makes us feel spiritual and then we attach it to whatever cultural/religious beliefs we have. This really depresses me --- how am I to ever know that I have the true God in mind and heart, when all I am doing is depending on very subjective experiences and modes of knowledge?

The concept of shirk depresses me even more. Most non-muslim folks seek God in earnest; they feel it within themselves; next thing they do is associate with God whatever cultural notions of God they have. Their notion of God is as much as their religion offers them. Nothing more, nothing less. A Christian --- even a very rational one who believes in truths of science --- after seeking and feeling God ends up believing in Jesus' help. Are they to be blamed? That's the language/mode of knowledge they have to reach God.

I wish I could understand the world and God better. My questions are too many and answers quite nil. I have no answer for anything. My psychologist tells me my need for God/faith is a human need that the brain/years of evolution and cultural thought puts on me. I am in agreement with this; and yet I know I have a mind that questions regardless of this need the nature and existence of God. My heart yearns to believe in a creative force despite evil and suffering that pervades the world. I am sure I have justifications for all this. And yet my mind is troubled about "which God". And even if the god I believe in is solely a palliative figment of my thoughts.

I am so confused and upset ---- each believing individual is at peace with God, no matter which religion they belong to. Either God exists in the brain or God sees no religion and offers comfort to all regardless of denominations and rituals. How do I reach out to God? How do I hear back from the creative force? How will I ever know that it's the authentic voice? I could have sworn as a Sunni my comfort and faith was authentic ...

Guys, this post is in earnest. I am a parent and spouse, and my depression and lack of faith has pushed me away into a corner. I need comforting words. How do I come back to God? Sometimes I feel God has locked my heart for doubting and questioning so much. But I have only doubted because I have rarely ever received proper answers. I envy people who have rock solid faith in this day and age. I am just so lost. I do not even know where I went wrong ... perhaps in questioning everything? But I only did so to have better faith and understanding ... But alas! All's lost. Unlike others, I did not gain insight into God or life; instead, I lost whatever morsel of hope I had.


I hope people who have gone through something similar will have words to share. How do you guys get back on track? How do you get back to God? How do learn to trust your heart and ignore the musings of the brain? Just how do you guys have faith and I do not?

Thanking you all in earnest,
A sleepless agnostic believer on thin ice

Sometimes i feel the same pain. I think i am also lost.. One book but so many contradicting and different interpretations.

I was following a Quran alone group on twitter when i asked them some question regarding their belief in miracles,they shut me down. Why this arrogance.

Muslims all around the world are going through some sort of trauma..from syria to china,kashmir to palestine... Why we r not able to overcome our ego OR muslim ummah is just a fairy tale?

I m really crying.

[SarahY]

No problem Rahma,

You had strong faith/belief and then you shook it up with new ideas, knowledge and even doubt... it sounds perfectly normal to crave the answers you've been conditioned to believe..

You know there is no answer for your questions but you still crave them? Maybe ask yourself Why? And what validation do they give.

I think it's good that you researched into authenticity, history etc it just shows how much more there is to knowledge, belief and truth than we think.

Proof and reason will have its subjectivity. I could argue there is no absolute disproof for God, heaven, hell etc.

You're building your soul, not risking your soul. Try not to be too harsh on yourself, try to trust yourself and be patient inshallah things will be fine. 

Asifzaheer,

People like to clique with each other and tend to support ideologies whether they agree or disagree for their own group purpose regardless of what name or label they put upon themselves... so i wouldn't take what people say too personally.

Muslims aren't the only people going through trauma.

I think most people are in their own fairy tale where they envision an idealistic dream of what a muslim ummah is.

[jkhan]

Sometimes i feel the same pain. I think i am also lost.. One book but so many contradicting and different interpretations.

I was following a Quran alone group on twitter when i asked them some question regarding their belief in miracles,they shut me down. Why this arrogance.

Muslims all around the world are going through some sort of trauma..from syria to china,kashmir to palestine... Why we r not able to overcome our ego OR muslim ummah is just a fairy tale?

I m really crying.

Peace...

Don't cry AZ... Didn't God promise that there some people from later generation in Janna... So, definitely there are believers even now... So be patient... We can't take action to everything in this world...

[amin]

Sometimes i feel the same pain. I think i am also lost.. One book but so many contradicting and different interpretations.

I was following a Quran alone group on twitter when i asked them some question regarding their belief in miracles,they shut me down. Why this arrogance.

Muslims all around the world are going through some sort of trauma..from syria to china,kashmir to palestine... Why we r not able to overcome our ego OR muslim ummah is just a fairy tale?

I m really crying.

Yes in a way muslim ummah is a fairy tale  it cannot be greater than you, your family, your language, your place, your country, its true for all religions.

The goodness in this world should be respected, and even Quran and Islam advocates the same, race towards it whereever it is, but not be proud of yourselves, thank God and that i think is the first step of being a muslim.

When I see a person in other faith, i see him as just following a different sign of God, sacred for him and he has every right to follow it, until his faith intrudes my personal freedom and well being, but sometimes we also need to compromise.
Example, See some sects here burn their dead instead of burying,  we may think its wrong, but it can be right too, think those living in mountainous rocky terrains, where  digging deep grave is difficult or those living in tropics where diseases spread easily, or think about those who travel long in the sea in ships? so to each their own good way/deen and accepting that is also part of being a muslim. So we should first get out of this bookish mindset and start asking questions ourselves we will get answers.

[Asifzaheer]

Thanx everybody for u support. I think this forum is different ,close to emotions.. love the people here,divided in opinions still respect n love each other.

Love n wasalaam.

[111111]

Peace:

RAHMA "Guys, this post is in earnest. I am a parent and spouse, and my depression and lack of faith has pushed me away into a corner. I need comforting words. How do I come back to God? Sometimes I feel God has locked my heart for doubting and questioning so much. But I have only doubted because I have rarely ever received proper answers. I envy people who have rock solid faith in this day and age. I am just so lost. I do not even know where I went wrong ... perhaps in questioning everything? But I only did so to have better faith and understanding ... But alas! All's lost. Unlike others, I did not gain insight into God or life; instead, I lost whatever morsel of hope I had."

---God never locks your heart for questioning.
---you do not get proper answers because you are seeking the blind for guidance.
---there is very few people in the truth this day and age, what you see is only people comfortable with the lie they are living.
---you are not lost you are confused.
---you never went wrong, on the contrary, God made you to the right.
---questioning everything is a right path.
---you did it because God willed it upon you, you just have to ask him for strength to resist the load that He is putting over your shoulders. You got to where you are now because you wanted the truth, and the truth is a heavy load to most men. Only the Most Merciful can give you strength to resist it.


Do not stop nourishing yourself with the word of God, and do not listen to the ignorant. only God can clarify the turbulent waters of your mind.
your confusion comes from the fact that what the Lord is making you see collides violently with the world in which you grew, live in.

Find some comfort in the story of P. Abraham, who suffered the same confusion searching for truth.

it is normal to think that we have gone crazy, because we cannot be the only ones seen what we see. difficult to accept that we can be the only ones right and everybody around us wrong, because of the fear of going wrong. But, God knows best upon whom He bestows His Mercy. it is not those seeking truth that ere in madness, it is the world that is in madness.

may God increase our knowledge and give us wisdom.